I confess, I’m a “goal geek” and I still passionately look forward to making New Year’s Resolutions. Why? Because I love to curl up on my couch with a crackling fire and hot cup of coffee to just let myself dream. It feels freeing, light, full of hope and inspiration. Now I know that you can create your life anytime you want. But there is something about this time of year that gives me full, unadulterated permission to wipe the slate clean and just start fresh.
People often ask, “How do you stick to those resolutions? I start inspired and focused but never follow through.” Full disclosure, there have been plenty of times, that by January 17th, the average day most people abandon their newfound goals, I have fallen off the wagon too.
But I have learned, in order to make New Year’s Resolutions work….these 5 things must happen.
1. Resolve - Resolution comes from the root word resolve, defined by good ‘ol webster...
Last winter, my friend Gigi told me a funny story about the time she moved to Brooklyn in her early twenties.
She was living in Ithaca, a small town about four hours upstate, and she was all excited to try to make it as a singer with her band in New York. Two days before she moved, though, she realized something relatively important: she didn't have any moving boxes. (Sometimes these things slip our minds, don’t they?) She didn't want to buy any, since she imagined they were prohibitively expensive, and she was broke. So she asked her roommate, Chris, if he had any.
"No," he said, "but let's go find some."
They walked downtown and started asking around. One person they asked, a guitarist playing Beatles songs on a street corner, suggested they ask at the liquor store. There, the manager there gave them a few Heineken boxes. Then he gestured to the shipping store across the street.
"They sell boxes," he said. "You can get all you want there."
So they went...
Awhile back, I began coaching an entrepreneur named Heidi – a successful, confident interior designer who just couldn’t figure out why her marriage was a mess.
“I don’t get it!” she said, pacing around my office. For someone who sounded so baffled, she looked incredibly put together – stylish heels, tailored suit, waves upon waves of blonde hair. “My partner and I just can’t seem to make it work. We’re going to therapy, and I’m trying everything our therapist says – we’re communicating more, I’m visualizing, I’m even meditating. But we still can’t seem to stop fighting. I’m at the end of my rope.” She stopped pacing at looked at me imploringly. “Can you help?”
“Tell me about the relationship you want.” I said, and she reeled off a list of things.
“Good communication. Love. Intimacy. Trust,” she said breezily, like she knew the right answer and had...
I often talk about the magic of movement. I love exercise - so much so that I built my whole business on it! - so I see that magic everyday, both in the latest research and also in watching my clients break through barriers and achieve their goals. I can tell you from experience: movement is nothing short of magical.
But of course, not everyone has that perspective. Some of you may be wondering, What's so great about moving? Sure, it's good for you, but isn't "magical" kind of a strong word?
That is a GREAT question!
I truly believe, in my heart of hearts, that movement is one of the most powerful and underutilized mindset tools there is. And guess what...science confirms it!
Here are 3 powerful reasons you need movement to manifest your goals (and one super-fun way you can start to do that).
1. Every single system in your body rewards you for moving. Exercise has a million and one physical benefits. It increases your...
How to get a success mindset? If you're wondering this, chances are you've got a big idea or goal in mind. I have a hunch that you've got something special in mind...and you're on the track by looking for ways to step into a success mindset!
Maybe you have an idea for starting a new business, or you felt a glimmer of inspiration for a new creative project. Or you’re finally ready to do that thing you’ve been saying you’re going to do for, I don’t know, ever.
Let me guess. At first, there was a lot of excitement. I’m gonna DO this! This time, it’s gonna work!
But maybe the excitement has worn off, and now you don't know where to start. You're standing at your desk or your whiteboard or your kitchen table, suddenly faced with all the million overwhelming tasks you need to do to make that goal a reality.
I've been there. (Who hasn't?) Especially for creative types who like to think big, that transition from "big idea" to "let's...
A lot of people ask me where the question “What if it’s easy?” came from. Is it the result of years of mind-body training? Did they teach it in coaching school? Did you learn it in acting classes, on the set of Guiding Light or One Life to Live, or on one of your adventures on Kilimanjaro or Macchu Picchu?
The funny thing is, it was none of those things. It was actually an accident.
It was on a sunny afternoon in Los Angeles. My husband Stephen and I were sitting in a hot rental car on Sunset Boulevard, that famous place where dreams come true…or come crashing down. And that’s what it felt like that day, as we sat there soaking in the terrible news.
He’d flown out from New York City for a meeting with his boss, and we’d been hoping for something good—a promotion, a raise, a new project. But instead, he’d been fired.
And he was devastated.
Looking at him, I saw something I hadn’t seen before from...
The other day, my friend Maddie called to tell me she’d reached her fitness goal of swimming a full mile.
“That’s amazing,” I said. “I didn’t know you were interested in swimming! When did you start training for that?” We’d been talking about fitness goals at the beginning of January, and she hadn’t mentioned this at all.
“Oh, forever ago,” she said breezily. “2018, I think it was. I took a COVID hiatus, but when my building’s pool reopened, I started up again. I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t want to jinx it. I never tell people my goals until after I’ve reached them.”
It was uncanny to hear that, because I’d just heard the exact opposite from my client Tim. “I always start by telling people what I’m doing,” he’d said last week. “That way, I’m on the hook—everyone’s expecting me to do it, so I can’t not.”
Many, many people I meet tell me they have doubts about manifesting. “If it’s as simple as it sounds,” they say, “why isn’t it working? I visualize what I want, but then nothing happens.”
That can be so frustrating. I get it because I’ve been there. The good news is, the reasons that manifesting doesn’t seem to “work” are pretty simple – and once you understand them, you can fix them.
The 3 biggest reasons why people aren't manifesting what they want boils down to these:
You’ve got to connect with your inner why. Why is that thing so...
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